Befriend the holes, sisters! They are like wrinkles; we earn them by living. And from cats. Sometimes I thread flowers into them. (The clothes, not the cats.) Where skin covering is needful, scarves and other accessories go a long way, or a slinky negligee. And I agree wholeheartedly with the comments here about comfy underwear or house pants. Does anyone here share my habit of wearing out bottoms before the tops of pyjamas? Recently I realised I'd accumulated several top halves of pjs, where the lower halves had long since been shredded for rags. I'll do anything to avoid shopping for clothes. What I detest most are the mirrors. If it's true that these were designed to manipulate low self-esteem into more purchasing, well, it had the reverse effect on me. I'd rather hang out in a bookshop. Speaking of which, a certain book is waiting for me to collect by a certain writer called Stephanie Wood, at one of our local stores. Yay!
Owner of many holy garments here (as in full of holes, not beatific)! I had one pair of leggings, now finally binned, that, whenever I wore them, my partner would say, "Five keys." (In joke which you might get if you remember Harvey Keitel and Holly Hunter in The Piano.)
I can't answer all those questions but here are some things that work for me:
1. Downstairs grooming is much easier post-menopause because there's not much left, so let those babies fly free. They are survivors!
2. You will feel better if you chuck out things you won't fit into (I got my friend who just loves sorting out people's crap to come over and sit with me for an afternoon. I offered her gossip, she got to look at me reproachfully while we did "op shop/rubbish bin/keep". When we were done she took the op shop stuff and dealt with it. She still thinks I need to shed clothes BUT my house is better for her presence)
3. Bras only stay good for a year, if that. Get one sports bra and one dressy bra, both from a qualified fitter. Every other day, wear Boody bra tanks
4. Yes it's fine to go out in your pajamas and ugg boots (or thongs)
5. Yes serums are good but only if they are caffeine or vitamin C. The Ordinary is rated by Choice and is seriously no bullshit
6. If your hair is terrible wear a wrap on your head
7. Linen is hella unflattering on a lady with a proper bosom. White sneakers have never been OK
8. Your toenails should be red, but they can also be metallic blues, metallic purples or metallic greens or clear sparkles. Never do mattes or opaques or block colours (unless red). Whites, yellows and oranges are pox. And figure out the tones in your red. With your fair hair, you want an orange-toned red. Stay away from brown toned reds. Darker skins rock blue-toned reds
9. Yes to wrap dresses. Always, just make sure there's enough in the wrap to cover the bosom well
10. Comfy bum means happy life. Always choose the cotton undies and make them big enough seams don't show.
My hot suggestion is that you don’t shop online but visit a store to try things on (quelle horreur I know but hear me out). There’s a clothing shop near me run by a couple of helpful and pragmatic ladies and I’m sure you’d love their range (shoes and accessories too). It’s at the top of Marrickville road in Dulwich Hill - “Urban Cachet”. Check out their website but more importantly, go in. They also send out a newsletter each week. Make shopping fun again!
A few answers, some of the beauty ones are beyond my experience which probably says more about me that anything else...
How many holes can a T-shirt have before it should be sent for recycling?
Between 4 and 10 (not scientific but I guess it depends where the holes are).
Will I ever find a moisturiser that will make my crepey dry hands feel less dry and crepey?
Maybe? But sadly it will only be temporary, age, hormones etc….wear elegant gloves and don’t worry?
Is it atrocious to swim without having groomed, um lower zones?
No, and if people stare, good luck to them.
Is it OK to walk a dog seven days a row wearing the same old sweater pilled to buggery?
Yes, unless you feel inspired to break out the cashmere and then of course a dog with muddy paws will jump on you…it is Murphy’s Law. Pilled sweater ok, priorities, Gaza etc.
Are leggings with big shirts and sweaters still a legitimate fashion choice? and if not, were they ever?
No, and not for a long time, nor jorts, nor jeggings..buy some linen trousers or a lovely skirt.
Are white sneakers passe?
Probably, were they ever good? On me they look like big powder puffs…I prefer a color, no brands….but Adidas have pretty colors? Or wear mary-janes, yay for mary-janes. Active wear in the form of shoes is mostly ugly.
Does anyone pay attention to a middle aged a woman anyway?
Not sure about this, maybe other middle aged women and older men? Not young people for sure.
Does anyone iron anymore?
No, unless I have to iron a white shirt and then I figure crumpled looks good sometimes if we are talking linen.
Is it ok to walk to the supermarket 200m away in pyjama bottoms and Ugg boots?
No, no, no, non, non, non….both items should never leave the backyard, in fact both items should go to the recycling bin asap.
What should a person do if they succumbed and coloured their hair after a period of allowing grey to come through but now think their hairdresser is turning their hair yellow and they can’t afford a fancier hairdresser and it seems impossible to let the grey come through without having a pandemic to hide in while it happens?
Don’t go back…yellow hair no good, fork out for the fancy hairdresser and remember if your hair looks good, you feel good, no place for doubt in the realm of hair.
If you ever decide to not go shopping, I’m in! I’ll be there before you can say, pathological dislike for shopping.
There are many things to dislike and my list grows as time goes on. I swing between cursing myself for wearing holey, falling apart clothes and celebrating how long I can keep wearing them and thus, avoid shopping.
Also, I do lots of online window shopping; i have a strict set of criteria for purchasing anything, which often means I buy nothing… see holes in clothes, worn out shoes, but kinder on the planet 🥇
There’s an app called ‘Good on You” which rates fashion brands on their labor practices and environmental impact. Pretty good search filters including by location and price.
And BCorp Australia has a directory you can search too.
‘The Very Good Bra’ is BCorp certified and Australian and no synthetic fabrics. I have looked but not purchased - I think you can request some personalised help from them.
I have one bottle of jojoba oil - great for dry skin and feels lovely
and one rosehip oil - good for healing.
It’s tough to make all these choices when you’ve grown up with the marketing machines. Remember the planet will be better off when you consume less and when you make the best choice you can. Especially after asking all those questions!
I have all the above questions except only have one answer in regards to underwear. Ok to wear your comfy big nanna undies when there is no possibility of anyone seeing you half naked but best bra and undies to make you feel special are Intimo (plus really lovely lie around the house wear). I have a lady who can come to my house and fit me for bras (which is an ongoing task as my boobs are taking over my body as I get closer to 60!). No need for shop visits and terrifying change room mirrors and you can try the bras under your clothes in your own wardrobe while she’s there! Let me know if you need her contact number, she’s based in Balmain and she’s the best!
I can so relate to this post with a bulging wardrobe of clothes I don’t wear, don’t like and don’t fit. Can advise re sports bra Lululemon make the best worth the $. Bottom line we need less clothing that we wear more often. All winter I have worn one pair of jeans, some stretchy leggings and about two jumpers I don’t think anyone has noticed. I have a boring work wardrobe of interchangeable tops and pants and two pairs of shoes not fancy and all machine washable with not an iron in sight. I am very in favour of an elastic waist nowadays.
A bit late to this, but here goes ... I have a few suggestions re clothes for, uhum, women who've tried to do '50 and fabulous' but gave up along the way.
a) Clothes. I've discovered a beaut store called Bounce. There's one in Oxford St Paddington, Darling St Balmain and QVB. The clothes are designed locally and are sophisticated without being too 'try-hard' and the fabrics are fab.
b) Shoes. Oh for the days when I could wear beautifully-crafted shoes from Italy, Spain etc. Sooo sick of wearing sneakers, and I've never liked the white sneaker look. Ever. So, try Shoes in the Attic in Darling St. Balmain. The woman who owns it has a good eye and buys well-made interesting stock from Europe. Alas, it's one of few remaining independently-owned shoe shops in Sydney, and we need to support them.
c) Bra sittings. Forget the department stores! I recently had to get fitted for bras after breast surgery and the staff at this place are lovely and expertly trained. It's called Acte3 Lingerie and it's in Darling St. Balmain.
• What sports bra best stops, um, wobbles (and would it take one from gym to gondola?).
In my case the best sports bra I ever bought was a Berlei one, secure, lasting, boringly white but super comfy...maybe not so flattering for the gondola?
I now prefer wireless bras but have found they are variable in fit and style, Boody, Bfree, Bonds and Simone Perele models all tend to make you look like you have an omni boob...no lift and separate as they used to say. I would be very grateful for any tips on the best wire free bras.
Befriend the holes, sisters! They are like wrinkles; we earn them by living. And from cats. Sometimes I thread flowers into them. (The clothes, not the cats.) Where skin covering is needful, scarves and other accessories go a long way, or a slinky negligee. And I agree wholeheartedly with the comments here about comfy underwear or house pants. Does anyone here share my habit of wearing out bottoms before the tops of pyjamas? Recently I realised I'd accumulated several top halves of pjs, where the lower halves had long since been shredded for rags. I'll do anything to avoid shopping for clothes. What I detest most are the mirrors. If it's true that these were designed to manipulate low self-esteem into more purchasing, well, it had the reverse effect on me. I'd rather hang out in a bookshop. Speaking of which, a certain book is waiting for me to collect by a certain writer called Stephanie Wood, at one of our local stores. Yay!
Owner of many holy garments here (as in full of holes, not beatific)! I had one pair of leggings, now finally binned, that, whenever I wore them, my partner would say, "Five keys." (In joke which you might get if you remember Harvey Keitel and Holly Hunter in The Piano.)
Glad you're persisting with cryptic crosswords!
heading to look up 'five keys' right now!
I can't answer all those questions but here are some things that work for me:
1. Downstairs grooming is much easier post-menopause because there's not much left, so let those babies fly free. They are survivors!
2. You will feel better if you chuck out things you won't fit into (I got my friend who just loves sorting out people's crap to come over and sit with me for an afternoon. I offered her gossip, she got to look at me reproachfully while we did "op shop/rubbish bin/keep". When we were done she took the op shop stuff and dealt with it. She still thinks I need to shed clothes BUT my house is better for her presence)
3. Bras only stay good for a year, if that. Get one sports bra and one dressy bra, both from a qualified fitter. Every other day, wear Boody bra tanks
4. Yes it's fine to go out in your pajamas and ugg boots (or thongs)
5. Yes serums are good but only if they are caffeine or vitamin C. The Ordinary is rated by Choice and is seriously no bullshit
6. If your hair is terrible wear a wrap on your head
7. Linen is hella unflattering on a lady with a proper bosom. White sneakers have never been OK
8. Your toenails should be red, but they can also be metallic blues, metallic purples or metallic greens or clear sparkles. Never do mattes or opaques or block colours (unless red). Whites, yellows and oranges are pox. And figure out the tones in your red. With your fair hair, you want an orange-toned red. Stay away from brown toned reds. Darker skins rock blue-toned reds
9. Yes to wrap dresses. Always, just make sure there's enough in the wrap to cover the bosom well
10. Comfy bum means happy life. Always choose the cotton undies and make them big enough seams don't show.
Yours, sorry I can't solve the hand thing x
Naomi ... I could not love this comment more and i will return to it day after day for years ahead. Thank you!
My hot suggestion is that you don’t shop online but visit a store to try things on (quelle horreur I know but hear me out). There’s a clothing shop near me run by a couple of helpful and pragmatic ladies and I’m sure you’d love their range (shoes and accessories too). It’s at the top of Marrickville road in Dulwich Hill - “Urban Cachet”. Check out their website but more importantly, go in. They also send out a newsletter each week. Make shopping fun again!
A few answers, some of the beauty ones are beyond my experience which probably says more about me that anything else...
How many holes can a T-shirt have before it should be sent for recycling?
Between 4 and 10 (not scientific but I guess it depends where the holes are).
Will I ever find a moisturiser that will make my crepey dry hands feel less dry and crepey?
Maybe? But sadly it will only be temporary, age, hormones etc….wear elegant gloves and don’t worry?
Is it atrocious to swim without having groomed, um lower zones?
No, and if people stare, good luck to them.
Is it OK to walk a dog seven days a row wearing the same old sweater pilled to buggery?
Yes, unless you feel inspired to break out the cashmere and then of course a dog with muddy paws will jump on you…it is Murphy’s Law. Pilled sweater ok, priorities, Gaza etc.
Are leggings with big shirts and sweaters still a legitimate fashion choice? and if not, were they ever?
No, and not for a long time, nor jorts, nor jeggings..buy some linen trousers or a lovely skirt.
Are white sneakers passe?
Probably, were they ever good? On me they look like big powder puffs…I prefer a color, no brands….but Adidas have pretty colors? Or wear mary-janes, yay for mary-janes. Active wear in the form of shoes is mostly ugly.
Does anyone pay attention to a middle aged a woman anyway?
Not sure about this, maybe other middle aged women and older men? Not young people for sure.
Does anyone iron anymore?
No, unless I have to iron a white shirt and then I figure crumpled looks good sometimes if we are talking linen.
Is it ok to walk to the supermarket 200m away in pyjama bottoms and Ugg boots?
No, no, no, non, non, non….both items should never leave the backyard, in fact both items should go to the recycling bin asap.
What should a person do if they succumbed and coloured their hair after a period of allowing grey to come through but now think their hairdresser is turning their hair yellow and they can’t afford a fancier hairdresser and it seems impossible to let the grey come through without having a pandemic to hide in while it happens?
Don’t go back…yellow hair no good, fork out for the fancy hairdresser and remember if your hair looks good, you feel good, no place for doubt in the realm of hair.
And, should I go shopping tomorrow?
Yes, yes, yes.
You are welcome!
If you ever decide to not go shopping, I’m in! I’ll be there before you can say, pathological dislike for shopping.
There are many things to dislike and my list grows as time goes on. I swing between cursing myself for wearing holey, falling apart clothes and celebrating how long I can keep wearing them and thus, avoid shopping.
Also, I do lots of online window shopping; i have a strict set of criteria for purchasing anything, which often means I buy nothing… see holes in clothes, worn out shoes, but kinder on the planet 🥇
There’s an app called ‘Good on You” which rates fashion brands on their labor practices and environmental impact. Pretty good search filters including by location and price.
And BCorp Australia has a directory you can search too.
‘The Very Good Bra’ is BCorp certified and Australian and no synthetic fabrics. I have looked but not purchased - I think you can request some personalised help from them.
I have one bottle of jojoba oil - great for dry skin and feels lovely
and one rosehip oil - good for healing.
It’s tough to make all these choices when you’ve grown up with the marketing machines. Remember the planet will be better off when you consume less and when you make the best choice you can. Especially after asking all those questions!
Good luck out there
I have all the above questions except only have one answer in regards to underwear. Ok to wear your comfy big nanna undies when there is no possibility of anyone seeing you half naked but best bra and undies to make you feel special are Intimo (plus really lovely lie around the house wear). I have a lady who can come to my house and fit me for bras (which is an ongoing task as my boobs are taking over my body as I get closer to 60!). No need for shop visits and terrifying change room mirrors and you can try the bras under your clothes in your own wardrobe while she’s there! Let me know if you need her contact number, she’s based in Balmain and she’s the best!
I can so relate to this post with a bulging wardrobe of clothes I don’t wear, don’t like and don’t fit. Can advise re sports bra Lululemon make the best worth the $. Bottom line we need less clothing that we wear more often. All winter I have worn one pair of jeans, some stretchy leggings and about two jumpers I don’t think anyone has noticed. I have a boring work wardrobe of interchangeable tops and pants and two pairs of shoes not fancy and all machine washable with not an iron in sight. I am very in favour of an elastic waist nowadays.
Thanks Fiona!!!! But what should i do with all the clothes I have that need ironing!?
Put on a movie get busy ironing and enjoy those beautiful clothes from a different perspective ♡.
A bit late to this, but here goes ... I have a few suggestions re clothes for, uhum, women who've tried to do '50 and fabulous' but gave up along the way.
a) Clothes. I've discovered a beaut store called Bounce. There's one in Oxford St Paddington, Darling St Balmain and QVB. The clothes are designed locally and are sophisticated without being too 'try-hard' and the fabrics are fab.
b) Shoes. Oh for the days when I could wear beautifully-crafted shoes from Italy, Spain etc. Sooo sick of wearing sneakers, and I've never liked the white sneaker look. Ever. So, try Shoes in the Attic in Darling St. Balmain. The woman who owns it has a good eye and buys well-made interesting stock from Europe. Alas, it's one of few remaining independently-owned shoe shops in Sydney, and we need to support them.
c) Bra sittings. Forget the department stores! I recently had to get fitted for bras after breast surgery and the staff at this place are lovely and expertly trained. It's called Acte3 Lingerie and it's in Darling St. Balmain.
Hope this helps.
Cheers, Ambra
Thanks so much Ambra! Lovely to hear from you! I'll go look them out.
And another thing...
• What sports bra best stops, um, wobbles (and would it take one from gym to gondola?).
In my case the best sports bra I ever bought was a Berlei one, secure, lasting, boringly white but super comfy...maybe not so flattering for the gondola?
I now prefer wireless bras but have found they are variable in fit and style, Boody, Bfree, Bonds and Simone Perele models all tend to make you look like you have an omni boob...no lift and separate as they used to say. I would be very grateful for any tips on the best wire free bras.